Why I named this blog Obnoxious Psychobabble and Blasphemy.
I initially and mainly chose the name because I would imagine that is what a lot of the things I say sound like to most people. I think theories about why we do the things we do almost always sound obnoxious and rambling because deep down we know that we are not really as complicated as those theories would make us out to be. There have been times in my life when I tried to buy into some fairly elaborate or complicated and convoluted theories for individual things I did or for the totality of who and what I was because it was obvious that I was a conundrum to myself, and I was ready to try anything. However, none of the theories really seemed to fit. I was always having to try to twist and contort myself and my experiences to fit myself into the theory rather than all the pieces of me fitting together neatly for the first time - like should happen with a good and accurate theory. At least from my vantage point my own theory or theories are fairly straight forward and uncomplicated when applied to myself or an individual. Throwing all the individuals together to form the societies we live in introduces a lot more uncertainties and complexities, but that is not my focus.
I added the Blasphemy to the title because I wanted to warn people in a somewhat joking manner that I would be freely considering, and for myself sometimes adopting unorthodox views of God. I do not believe it is important for others to share my particular views of God, but I do believe it is important to engage in the struggle to settle upon what it is that you really believe at any given time. And my hope is that my sharing my views may spur others to be open enough to explore what they believe and be OK with whatever they find. Being settled on something that feels right in this regard is a nice place to be, even if it is sometimes only temporary.
Finally, I chose the tittle because it felt right from the perspective of adding a little humility into the equation. It feels very odd and at least somewhat wrong for me, a person who has made a ton of mistakes and a mess out of their life many times, to be offering up with confidence answers or solutions to some of life's toughest and trickiest problems. The normal solution to this problem seems to be to say that it is God working through me and not me. That only somewhat jives with my current beliefs regarding God and man though, and beyond anything else I am committed to being as honest as I can be, even at the risk of pushing people away. And I do believe strongly in owning up to and claiming all of ourselves; the good and the bad parts and not separating them from ourselves to ascribe them to God or the devil or whatever.
Certainly though none of my insights or answers or revelations would have been possible without my connection to God. As I previously discussed almost all of my answers have come during times of what I would consider meditation. Additionally, my felt need to share what I think I have found also comes from my connection to God. So maybe I am just splitting hairs.
Any way if you are still with me, thank you for being patient with me while I discussed all these preliminary things I felt were necessary. If it has driven you nuts - my need to discuss so many preliminary things - you are in good company. It drives my wife nuts regularly, and she is probably the most instrumental person in helping me get to where I am today. She recently told me I have a long wind-up.
